How I Caught My Frog

By Miss Piggy (transcriped from the Miss Piggy Calander, 1981)





Rana Kermitta, the common frog -- though only a booknosed biologist would consider this magnificent specmen common -- is as smart a critter as he is handsome, and if you want to lasso this baby, you've go to be just as quick on the uptake as he is.

I chose the location of my stand with a great deal of care -- a stone ledge on the end of a small swamp with a good field of view. I picked the time right, too -- full moon on a hot summer night.

As I bid adieu to my Seminole guide, he apprised my arrangements with an approving nod. "You gonna get your hands on something green tonight, missy, for sure," he remarked. "I ought to," I said impishly, remembering his hefty fee for showing me that special swamp of his. "I certainly put enough of something green in yours."

It might surprise veteran hunters, but I had placed myself upwind of my prey, not downwind, counting on the evening breeze to carry a few wiffs of the powerful frog-attracting scent I'd packed in my London Bog swamp jacket. I put a dab of two behind each eat, set out my lure, and settled down to wait.

Tonight the bait I'd opted for was a single-dip soft-vanilla sugar come with a solitary cherry -- the Old Reliable. I've used heavier stuff -- tripple scoops, exotic toppings, mixed flavors -- but I've found that for hooking their interest on that all-important first look, you can't beat the cool, white flash of creamy vanilla. And let me tell you, if you don't get your frog interested fast, you don't get a second chance.

A soft rustle in the eel grass told me my quarry was approaching. I could feel my heart pounding as I saw in the glare of my Marsh Master 12-volt lantern a pair of olive mitts closing on my lure. Slowly, I raised my net and poised myself to lunge. Closer and closer he came. It took all my concentration to keep that cone steady and not spook him with a sud-
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Editor's note...we could not find the continued clipping of that article, no matter how hard we searched through the drawers in Miss Piggy's wardrobe...